Light in Relationships

On May 10th at our weekday activity, we were spoiled to have guest speaker Liz Wiseman (from the Valparaiso Ward) talk to us about light in relationships and different leadership models that can help us at work, in the classroom, or at home. Most of what she spoke about came from her book Multipliers. Here are some brief notes for any sisters who missed the evening.

*There are 2 basic types of leaders -- Multipliers and Diminishers.
-Multipliers augment the intelligence of those around them. They make the people around them feel motivated and brilliant, and the encourage good work.
-Diminishers make those around them question their intelligence, and consequently everyone works less efficiently.

What are people like when they're around me? When they're not around me? When are they at their best? Do I create an environment where good things happen?

Liz asked the sisters in the room to brainstorm and come up with two leaders we knew, one who was a diminisher, one who was a multiplier, and then write down on post-it notes what made these leaders belong to either camp. Then she asked us to write down on separate post-its how efficient we were with these people, in terms of a number percentage. Here is an abbreviated list attributes or adjectives we came up with for each model, along with the average work efficiency of our group:

-Diminishers-
criticize, do everything themselves
always correcting, humiliating
inattentive, don't ask follow-up questions
don't listen, critique everything
got angry
"that's nice, but..."
made me hate work
only her ideas would work

Average work efficiency - 33%
Diminishers - fundamentally believe they can do a better job themselves, and that people will not figure it out without them. Working with/for them is most often deemed frustrating and exhausting.
(Liz pointed out that you don't need to be mean-spirited to be a diminisher. Most diminishers have very good intentions!)

-Multipliers-
love people, ask questions
empower, encourage
praise work, ideas and philosophies
gave confidence, want ideas from everyone
nurture
relentlessly expect our best
challenge, push hard
shameless about asking to do hard things

Average work efficiency - 95%
Multipliers- fundamentally believe that they can expect the best of others and that other people are smart. They give people their space and in return expect their best thinking. Working with/for them is most often deemed exhausting and exhilarating! Much like an intense, invigorating workout.

Liz mentioned the interesting correlation between Satan's plan and Christ's plan, and how Satan is the ultimate Diminisher and Christ is the ultimate Multiplier. Satan wanted to micromanage every aspect of our lives since he didn't think we were smart enough to figure it out, whereas Christ trusts us and grants us the agency to make mistakes and in turn become more creative and satisfied and fulfilled. Agency is the big difference here.

One of the main principles Liz taught us is that the value of answers diminishes over time, whereas the value of questions increases over time. If we keep trying to provide answers and statements to those around us because we think we know best, this will soon lose value and those around us will feel dumbed down or diminished. But if we make it a habit to ask questions, provoking the curiosity and minds of those around us (especially children!), others will trust their intelligence more and feel more confident.

Take this quiz on her book's website to find out if you are an accidental diminisher.

Fascinating, thought-provoking evening! Thank you Liz!