Chosen to Bear Testimony of My Name - February 28, 2016

Miriam taught from Elder David A. Bednar's talk "Chosen to Bear Testimony of My Name" from the October General Conference.

Elder Hales paused for a moment and responded, “When you cannot do what you have always done, then you only do what matters most.” (Chosen to Bear Testimony of My Name)

• How have your priorities changed as you have matured? 

They have learned to understand the divine language of the Holy Spirit and the Lord’s patterns for receiving revelation. These ordinary men have undergone a most extraordinary developmental process that has sharpened their vision, informed their insight, engendered love for people from all nations and circumstances, and affirmed the reality of the Restoration. (Chosen to Bear Testimony of My Name)

• How have you grown in your ability to receive and understand revelation?

As we counsel together, inspiration has been received and decisions have been made that reflect a degree of light and truth far beyond human intelligence, reasoning, and experience. As we work together in unity on perplexing problems, our collective understanding of an issue has been enlarged in marvelous ways by the power of the Holy Ghost. (Chosen to Bear Testimony of My Name)

• What wisdom you have especially gleaned from "more seasoned" friends and family members, or from church leaders?

We heard from Gail, Carolyn P. and Jean of some wisdom they have gained over the years.
Patience, kindness, developing a listening ear, being understanding of other people, being slow to judge, having a forgiving spirit, accepting others having a different opinion than my own, letting go, respect in the home brings peace, judgement day is far off because there is still so much to teach, "There is nothing more confining than the prison we know not that we are in" - Shakespeare, find what's holding you back.

President James E. Faust

President Gordon B. Hinckley

Elder Joseph B. Wirthlin

Elder L. Tom Perry

President Boyd K. Packer

Elder Richard G. Scott

The Savior declared, “Whether by mine own voice or by the voice of my servants, it is the same” (D&C 1:38). May we hear and heed the eternal truths taught by the Lord’s authorized representatives. As we do so, I promise our faith in Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ will be fortified, and we will receive spiritual guidance and protection for our specific circumstances and needs. (Chosen to Bear Testimony of My Name)

Lesson Summary: February 2, 2014

President Hancock gave a wonderful stake presidency message. The following summary is only a summary and can never be a substitution for the wonderful presentation of President Hancock.

There were 4 topics of discussion
1) The stake presidency loves us
2) They want to tell us (the women) what they are telling the men in the stake
3) Discuss a few observations about women in the stake
4) The stake presidency wants our feedback. Q&A

1) The stake presidency loves us

• This is a topic of Infinite expanse. We are women of different backgrounds, goals and life challenges.
• The stake presidency wants to love us and support us. They acknowledge that women in our stake don't get enough help 

2) What are they telling the men?

• Understanding priorities
• First- wife, second- children, third- employer, fourth- church 
• They want all families to eat dinner together every night
• Do whatever it takes to eat dinner together every night – we believe this practice has welding power for families.
• We, of the stake presidency, don’t want ANY church activities scheduled anytime between 5-7 p.m.
• Read to children (together with wife)
• This should be a regular part of the rhythm of life, 
  that reading together becomes a regular family activity.
• Private things should be between you (couple) and the Lord 
• The way you carve out roles and responsibilities between husband and wife is a private matter.
• Stake presidency will never prescribe how it is done 
• ie: how your organize around your priorities, how you raise your children, when you conceive your children, what kind of employ you accept is completely up to you/your spouse/God.
• Both men and women are nurturers
• All men should feel like they are nurturers of children
• Men are capable of nurturing- they are encouraged to seek and acquire virtues. 
• Unity is the crowning virtue in the home
• All husbands and wife should be truly unified
• reference: John 16&17,  pray they will be one(as the father and son are one)

3) A few observations about the woman

• A lot of the women don't think they are good enough
•  The stake presidency loves us the way we are, they wish we would feel more secure
• Message: we think you are MORE than sufficient. 
• They have observed that the women seem to be more prone to insecurities
• For example: women will see something in another women.  But instead of celebrating this talent, she will see this as something as her own inadequacy.
• Message:  We wish you would feel more secure. 
• We are under stress
• Message: The way you prioritize your life is between us and lord (have confidence in life choices
• Worst place to turn is to society. 
• We don't get enough help 
• Message:  This grieves us.  We’re trying to talk to the men about this. We’re trying to work on this.
• We are prone to depression
• Depression doesn't need reason and doesn't require explanation
• Message: They understand this and are anxious to be providing love and tenderness for those battling these issues
• Reference: Elder Hollands talk in October 2013 conference 
• We should talk about this, not whisper about it
• Society tells terrible lies about women
• Suspect this is grievous to the The Lord
• Message: Stake presidency acknowledges this and doesn't want the women in stake comparing themselves to impossible standards
• Find confirmation of own worth from The Lord.  
• We make long checklists
• Checklists stress us out
• See if you can make a shorter check list
• Be strategic about how to use time
• Message: They think we do enough... Think about being instead of doing  

4) Q&A

• Q. How do you not stress out about callings? 
• A: Is this the right calling for me right now in my life?
• Cycle is completed when you confirm this calling is right for you with the Lord
• Q. How do you build spirituality in a marriage? (Deserves lesson of own) 
• A: The wonderful thing about marriage is that we’re completely incompatible --- no one has the same spiritual DNA; wonderful thing about marriage is that is a school. Have to figure out how to build. Sometime it requires recognizing the differences and celebrating them. It is so important to have dialog – if your lips are moving that’s a great sign. If the partners go silent, then something fundamental has happened and surgery is required.

The Gospel is not a club to beat ourselves with, 

but a pillow we lay our head 

    This poem reflects how the stake presidency feels about you. 

LOVE

Love bade me welcome; yet my soul drew back,

Guilty of dust and sin.

But quick-eyed Love, observing me grow slack

From my first entrance in,

Drew nearer to me, sweetly questioning

If I lacked anything.

“A guest,” I answered, “Worthy to be here.”

Love said, “You shall be he.”

“I, the unkind, ungrateful?  Ah my dear,

I cannot look on Thee.”

Love took my hand, and smiling, did reply,

“Who made the eyes but I?”

“Truth, Lord, but I have marred them; let my shame

Go where it doth deserve.”

“And know you not,” says Love, “who bore the blame?”

“My dear, then I will serve.”

“You must sit down,” says Love, “and taste my meat.”

So I did sit and eat.

George Herbert

1593-1633